Fear Is a Liar (But Also Weirdly Convincing): How to Overcome It and Grow Anyway

If you’ve ever hesitated to hit “send,” said “yes” to something you didn’t want to do, or avoided asking for help because yikes, welcome to our club: Fear and the People Who Are Trying to Outgrow It. We meet on Wednesdays.

The good news? You can overcome fear.

The bad news? Fear is crafty. It doesn’t just hide in dark alleyways—it hides in your inbox, your self-talk, and your calendar.

Step One: Spot the Sneaky Fears

Some fears are obvious (looking at you, skydiving), but the ones that slow down personal growth are often more subtle:

• Fear of failure: What if I try and suck?

• Fear of judgment: What if people think I’m cringey?

• Fear of success: Wait… what if it works and I can’t keep up?

• Fear of being “too much” or “not enough” (Sometimes on the same day!)

These fears tend to disguise themselves as:

• Perfectionism

• Procrastination

• Overthinking (aka: analysis paralysis)

• Chronic “I’m fine”-ing

Step Two: Unpack the Why

Fears are often rooted in old stories:

• That one teacher who said you were “too talkative”

• A childhood moment where you felt rejected (I can’t be the only one who has ever been picked last for dodgeball.)

• Generational beliefs around what’s “realistic” or “responsible”

Fear is just your brain trying to keep you safe based on outdated data. (Thanks, brain! But also, stop.)

Step Three: Use Psychological Tools (Like, Actual Ones)

Let’s talk about some brain-hacking magic:

🧠 Cognitive Reframing

• Change “I’ll never get this right” to “I’m learning as I go.”

• Sounds simple. Is powerful.

💬 Exposure Therapy (The Gentle Kind)

• Do the scary thing in small, manageable doses

• Speak on a podcast before hosting your own

• Post on social media without checking likes every 3 minutes

📝 Journaling with Prompts

• “What’s the worst that could happen?” (Spoiler: It’s rarely that bad.)

• “What would I do if I weren’t scared?”

🪞Inner Child Work

• Talk to the younger you who first felt that fear

• Reparent her with kindness and validation

TL;DR: Fear Is Loud, But You Can Be Louder

Fear doesn’t go away forever. But you can:

• Call it out

• Understand where it came from

• Take small actions in spite of it

• Celebrate when you do (yes, snacks count as celebration)

Final Thought

Growth requires risk. And risk always wakes fear up. But when you know how to dance with it—not hide from it—you become unstoppable.

Because fear might be loud…

…but you? You’re brave on purpose.